На рассмотрение предлагаю еще один текст

[Marina Westley-Richards]

Castle of my sorrow
I
I’m sitting lonely
Near the fireplace,
Listening to the sound of the rain,
Night is my adviser and my dearest guest
And my lover is neverending pain.
Ch.
You gave me the last brick
For the castle of my sorrow,
In the window I can see just loneliness
And no tomorrow.
Love and joy are not my neighbors anymore,
In the castle of my sorrow
You won’t visit me for sure.
II
I will close the door
For dignity and faith,
I’m queen of darkness
And your lies.
I will never show
Expression of my face,
I’m not ready
For the sacrifice.
Ch.
You gave me the last brick
For the castle of my sorrow,
In the window I can see just loneliness
And no tomorrow.
Love and joy are not my neighbors anymore,
In the castle of my sorrow
You won’t visit me for sure.

There is no way back from here,
And I won’t leave my temple,
The eternity and doubts will stay with me.

[.._ _..]

эхххх.... переводик бы еще на русском

[Starpatcher]

В музыкальном ритме лучше было бы

And there is no (anymore?) tomorrow


и.......
You gave me the last brick
немного прямолинейно
может лучше построил, положил

Your word was the last brick
In the castle of my sorrow
Where through the window
I can see just loneliness

[Marina Westley-Richards]

Да не вопрос, мелкие корректировки это ведь не проблема :)